Live From Joy

I've been a little stuck trying to find things to write about now that school is over. I want to share thoughts and inspiration here but I think sometimes I get weighed down by expectations that it must be a particular length or profound in some way. I have to admit that I don't feel inspired to keep writing but I made the commitment so I will do 40 blog posts. It's just going to take a bit longer than I thought. So what is inspiring me lately? Where is there joy? I've been preparing to give a talk on Education for Life and it's been fun to ponder all the amazing ways the EFL principles are present and expanding and spreading in our world and throughout education. People are starting to really rethink the purpose and methods of education in a whole new way. The old systems are breaking down and suddenly we're trying to prepare children for a world that doesn't yet exist, that we can't imagine, that they will create! In the midst of the pandemic even we a...

Somebody asked him, “Did you win?” He said, “No, but I won against myself” (laughter), meaning that he beat his own record. How beautiful for an eight-year-old child to understand this! You find that in Ananda schools there is this same kind of cooperative effort to help each other – not to put each other down, which is so normal with children. Swami Kriyananda in Light of Superconsciousness We don't avoid competition all together at our school but we do try to guide students to be aware of their energy, of how they feel and how they act, when they do compete. Sometimes we'll change the rules of the game to make sure each player is being challenged appropriately. For example, we might make a team of athletes vs. "non-athletes" but the non- athletes score points for making contact with the ball. Or a skilled player has to make at least 3 passes before each attempt at scoring. (Just as a note: these are blanket suggestions, they're solutions that arose based on spe...

Sometimes when I tell people that I'm a teacher they say something like, "I don't know how you do it!" and I laugh and reply "I don't know either!" But the truth is, I do know: I'm not the one doing it. So who or what is? Well, you can call it what you want - grace, magic, energy, intuition, Divine Mother or God - but sooner or later you start to realize there is something else at work that you can't quite see or fully understand.  I had a sweet, magical moment one afternoon that reminded me that Divine Mother knows just what each of us needs in each moment. I had gone down to the Village center to use the stronger internet connection to upload something for my class. While I was there waiting for things to upload I sat in this beautiful communal space all by myself feeling a bit sad and out of sorts. Not even a few moments later a little boy from the community came walking by and went to check on a nest of birds they'd been watching in a bus...

Today I'm feeling so quiet and still. There are dishes to be washed, books to be read, walks to be taken and yet all I want to do is just be. Not even meditate, just sit silent and still and do absolutely nothing at all. Of course then come all the thoughts: I should be using this time wisely! There's so many things on the list! What will I have to show for this day? But I've noticed that there are days of high energy, flow and productivity where a sudden burst comes and then there are days like today where it seems like nothing happens. It's okay to let this be a moment of rest. Again and again I seem to be learning that we are not what we do . One of the most powerful lessons I've learned about Education for Life is that it's not about what you do, but about who you are. It's not about what your students do (or don't do) it's about who they are. Not merely their personalities but their soul-self, their highest and best selves. In the classroom ther...

I think that sense that you have, when you’re caring for a child, that this individual child — just them, just because of who they are — is the most valuable thing in the world — not because they are particularly smart or particularly pretty; it’s just them; they’re incredibly valuable — I think that’s when we’re seeing people clearly. That’s when we’re actually understanding what human values are like. -Allison Gopnik from On Being podcast This is from an interview with Allison Gopnik, a professor of psychology and affiliate professor of philosophy at U.C. Berkeley. She studies the minds of babies and children to help us understand ourselves and what it means to be human. This entire interview was very moving but this part hit me so deeply today that I had to try to share.  In the interview, after the above quote, she goes on to say how she and her sisters joke about their grandchild being best. I think, even if we haven't had kids, we all can think of someone special that we...

Swami Kriyananda once shared a superconscious dream he had where he talked with Yogananda about a difficult situation saying "The doors are closed." Yogananda's response: "Don't overlook the possibility of a skylight" and then he added, "A sense of adventure is needed." We are definitely looking for skylights these days when it comes to planning for the upcoming school year. The number of considerations and possibilities seem endless. Now this can seem frustrating and overwhelming but it can also seem incredibly expansive.  Anything is could happen.  There's at least two ways you could say that: with a sense of dread or a sense of excitement. Will we trudge through, wishing it could be otherwise, focused on all that is lacking? Or will we embrace the opportunity before us to completely reimagine our school year and the learning experience we provide? So far it seems, we are choosing to have a sense of adventure. The ideas that are coming up see...

I was watching a class that was given recently about how to teach online. The instructor pointed out the move to online learning is highlighting and supporting certain changes that have been happening in education overall. The old model was the "sage on the stage" which is a teacher centered model where an instructor imparts their knowledge. The new model is the "guide on the side" where the learners are actively engaged in the learning process. The goal of this particular class was to help give people alternatives to simply using a video conference platform to offer their courses and to introduce people to the potentials of learning management systems to make online learning more engaging and interactive.  It was wonderful to hear this perspective since our school and the Education for Life approach is firmly grounded in these types of more dynamic and experiential methods. Our curriculum is student centered meaning we develop the themes and lessons around the stud...

I was thinking about distance learning and Zoom classes and sharing with a friend the many challenges. So much of what it means to be an Education for Life teacher is about magnetism and energy. It's not as much about what we do, the lesson we prepare or the activities we offer but who we are as individuals and the energy and attitude we bring into our classroom. How do we get that to go through a computer screen? When I began my journey as an EFL teacher I spent a lot of time looking at what other more experienced teachers were doing and trying to find ways to bring that into my classroom but I felt like I kept coming up short. I couldn't be like those other teachers and gradually I realized that "being a good teacher" was much less about any outward performance or product and much more about being myself; bringing my whole, authentic, fully-present self to the classroom in each moment. It wasn't about being perfect, it was about being me. That is in essence what...

I finally ended up cleaning my classroom and moving all the furniture to prepare for the annual carpet cleaning. I kept putting it off partly because those bookcases are heavy! But it’s also another confirmation that this school year is actually over. The classroom was pretty much frozen in time from mid-March when quarantine started. Paper snowflakes still on the windows, our last math lesson still on the board, so many unread books piled up on my desk and cobwebs everywhere marking the passage of time; the absence of activity. Well, I got some help moving the heavy bookcases and I vacuumed all the cobwebs. I boxed up the students' things to send home and I’m finishing their progress reports. It’s time to let go. It’s okay to let go. It’s hard to let go and it’s okay that it’s hard but somehow it seems a bit harder when it’s so uncertain what will come next. I know things will be different, things will change, but I don't know how. It reminds me of another time I was approachi...

One of the things I miss the most about being in the classroom five days a week is the opportunity it gives me to completely forget myself. I use to think this was something inherent to teaching but I think it's what happens whenever we become deeply absorbed in something. We lose all sense of time and self and we get into a flow. Some people might experience this while playing a sport or running, others while cooking, creating or making music.  I miss that flow, that absorption, that sense of focus and purpose. I've certainly been able to keep myself busy with new activities and projects, like this blog, but it has also felt somewhat restless and unfocused. There isn't the usual sense of external order and flow to the day that was once there and so it seems harder to forget myself. Instead, I'm learning to listen to and trust myself more. Since there isn't the usual external flow of events there is a need to turn inward to find a new flow. Weeks and weekends, the u...

When the thought of having to close our school first came up and the suggestion to start creating distance learning materials arose I thought "How on earth can you do Education for Life at a distance?" So much of what we do is working with energy and magnetism. How can you send that home in a packet or through a computer screen? Then schools closed and the reality is that, despite the challenges, this has been the perfect time for Education for Life. In fact, there is no wrong time, place or age to apply these principles. That's why it's call Education for LIFE! It prepares us to engage with and learn from everything we encounter in life. When Paramhansa Yogananda first founded his schools in India (from which our schools have drawn inspiration) he called them "How to Live Schools." There is so much to be learned from life as it unfolding, pandemic and all! There is so much to be learned about "how to live" in every new situation. Even though we we...

The energy it takes to avoid a difficult conversation is much more uncomfortable than the energy it takes to have the conversation. Many times it's the anticipation is many times worse than the actual conversation. Our minds play out all sorts of worst case scenarios.  This is in the case where we know the conversation is coming. But what about when we suddenly find ourselves in the middle of, or even listening in on, a conversation that suddenly becomes uncomfortable? Perhaps someone has said or done something disagreeable, confusing or unexpected. These things happen regularly in the classroom - kids really do say and do the "darndest things." They say and do mean things to each other without thinking. But these moments are also just a part of life. The question is, how do we react or respond?  Most of us fight, freeze or flee. It's how our brains are hardwired to respond to stressful situations. The problem is, this response gets in the way of learning and growth. ...

It's been an intense week for the world and for some reason I've been tuning in and paying attention more than usual. I don't usually watch or follow the news at all. I rely on others to let me know if something really big is happening but something has shifted recently. I don't know what's different but it suddenly feels very important to pay attention and stay engaged. I completely understand the desire to avoid the news, not take in too much. What's happening is not always positive or uplifting. But it is important. For racism to end, we all have to participate in dismantling it, within ourselves, our families, our communities and our organizations. Trying to write about anything else right now seems irrelevant and yet trying to convey all that I'm taking in and processing seems impossible. It's an important time for self-reflection, introspection. I am what I am; wishing cannot change me. Let me therefore face my faults with gratitude, for only by fa...

Today was our last day of online class. Never in my wildest dreams ever thought I would be saying those words or living this reality. It was, much like our virtual track meet on Tuesday, one of our best days of our distance learning experience. I would still have preferred to be together but it seems distance makes the heart grow fonder. I appreciate each of them and our class as a whole so much more deeply than I think I might have if we'd been going through our usual routine. It's so easy to get caught in a mentality of just getting through to the end of the year. I'm thankful for the slowness, for the shift in perspective, that this time has offered.  As part of our time together I read them a story called The Invisible String by Patrice Karst. It was hard not to cry while reading it! The message is this: we are all, always, connected by invisible strings of love that connect our hearts and we are never really alone. Such a sweet way to end our year and this strange time...

I don't have all the answers. In fact right now I am fresh out of answers. But I do have a choice about the way I react to not having the answers. I have curiosity. I got upset by a situation today, feeling let down by other people's actions. I felt frustrated and sad. I could feel myself sinking down into it and not enjoying the ride. At the same time I knew I couldn't simply expect myself to "snap out of it" and be happy and joyful. But a part of me wanted more joy than I was experiencing, to not feel so affected by it. I could at least remember that joy existed even if that wasn't my primary experience in that moment. I knew that even though I was agitated I could also be curious about what was happening and how things were unfolding.  Conflict, difficulty, discomfort - they have lessons for us if we're willing to learn. They can bring things to our attention in new ways, even if all we notice is our own reaction. When we're curious about conflict w...

Each day that I write I feel I leave a dozens of thoughts unwritten like threads unwoven. There are so many layers and connection to each of the topics I've touched on so far and hopefully as I continue I will be able to circle back and go deeper. Today, amidst all the protesting that is happening, it feels like maybe mine is not the voice that needs to be heard. It feels hard to write.  It seems like an important moment to step back and listen, observe and learn. If there were a conflict or disruption in my classroom, this is what I would do too. I may need to respond or react in the moment but I can also reflect and learn from my reactions. Some of the most valuable lessons and most positive solutions have come when I can listen, observe and get curious about what's really happening and why. When I stop assigning blame or thinking that I have all the answers.  So often as parents and teachers we can get caught in thinking we know what is best or even caught in the thought th...

Paramhansa Yogananda talked a great deal about the importance of all-sided education - developing ourselves not only intellectually but also physically and psychologically. Swami Kriyanada has translated this into the four "Tools of Maturity" - body, feeling, will and intellect. In American culture we value body, will and intellect to varying degrees but it seems there is very little attention paid to how to positively develop the feeling aspect of ourselves. We're left thinking that there is something inherently wrong with feelings, that they're not to be trusted. Nothing could be further from the truth.  "Only by calm inner feeling can a person know definitely the right course to take in any action. Those who direct their lives from this deeper level of feeling achieve levels of success that are never reached by people who limit their quest for answers to the exercise of reason. Reason, indeed, if unsupported by feeling, may point in hundreds of plausible direc...

Some might recognize this quote from the movie Pollyanna. I recently rewatched this movie and was deeply inspired by the way Pollyanna looked for the good in every situation and especially in every person. The people in the town were transformed by her perspective. Our thoughts and expectations can be more powerful than we realize. What struck me is that it wasn't merely positive thinking. Pollyanna genuine looked for the good in each situation, even if she needed to stretch a bit and she felt the benefit of that effort. Then gradually those around her began to feel the effects as well. They weren't instantly won over but with a bit of persistence, they began to see and feel the benefit of the "glad game" as she called it. I still remember taking the first course in Education for Life through the online training program . The instructor gave us our homework assignment the first week: look for the light. We were to look for moment of lightness and childlikeness, moment...

At beginning of the year I participated in an art workshop where we each chose a word for the year. Rather than creating specific resolutions we chose one word as our focus or inspiration for the year. The word I chose was patience. Now, as we wade through the unknown and find ourselves ending every conversation with "let's wait and see," I'm wondering, what does it really mean to be patient? Is it simply a matter of waiting, of timing? Or is it an inner calmness you bring as you forge ahead anyways? Patience typically seems like a passive quality but I'm wondering how to practice it more dynamically, with greater energy and intention. A large part of patience is accepting things as they are. As Swami Kriyananda says in his book Affirmations for Self-Healing: Patience means also adjusting to whatever is in life, rather than wishing it were something else. ... For it is when we work with things as they are that we can change them to whatever we might like them to b...

I don't usually engage much with the news or politics but I think what is happening right now in our world is beyond politics. It is about justice and truth, about reclaiming our humanity and standing up for what matters most. We can talk about and criticize how others are acting but in the end, what example are we setting by what we do, by the choices we make? If we want harmony or peace, are we at peace within ourselves and the people in our lives? If we want clarity and truth, how honest are we being with ourselves and others? Everything we do has a ripple effect and while we usually won't change someone with a lecture, we can subtlety influence them with our actions and attitudes. People, especially children, learn more from what you do and how you act then from what you say.  I came across this incredible talk from Trevor Noah that touches on recent events and people's reactions and the power and responsibility of those in leadership to lead by example, not by force o...

Taking yourself too seriously? Get ready for a curve ball being thrown in your direction! A little bit of "bizarre" will help you work through what you need to work through. -Coyote I saw a coyote yesterday at dusk and looked up the symbolism. Animals that cross our paths have messages for us. Well I'm definitely ready for a curve ball these days, something to shake things up. Which might sound surprising considering the current state of things seems to be one curve ball after another. I think what I'm really ready for is an "inner curve ball," something to help shift my way of seeing and relating to the circumstances at hand. In a conversation with a friend I commented a bit on this and the need to find ways to redirect current energy going into well worn grooves of habit (mostly thought habits right now). I can see energy going in certain directions and instead of trying to simply STOP that from happening, I'd like to find ways to apply or direct that ...

I could easily make a long list of all the things that make distance learning frustrating and impossible but it wouldn't really change things except maybe to make me feel crankier and more annoyed. A friend of mine was recently commenting on a project he was assigned to at work. Being perfectly honest he said "I don't really like it... but I realize I don't like being unhappy even more." Wise words. Wiser perhaps than he even realized.  We have a choice. There are many things we can't control. This may seem more true now that ever before. Or maybe we're just realizing how little control we've always have. Either way there is always one thing you can control - your attitude. How easy, how seemingly rational, even how socially acceptable it is to blame our state of mind and our emotions on the current circumstances. But as Yogananda says, "Conditions are always neutral, it is how we react to them that makes them seem good or bad." This is a dee...

Last year I ended the year with a special project. We all contributed to a list of different things we would remember about our school year together and then I created a little book and gave one to each child. It's a way for us to think back on the year and end on a high note, thinking of the things we will miss but reframing it as things we want to remember.  We worked on our list today in our class call and it was a wonderful reminder of all the awesome learning and fun that was had the first 6 months of school. Despite the last 2 plus months of craziness it really was a great school year and I'm going to really miss this class. In fact I have been missing them already!  I really enjoyed writing up the awards I will give each of them this year. In the past it's been a bit challenging to give it time and energy in the midst of all the other end-of-the-year activities. I think having this distance has made it a bit easier to get perspective on each of them and focus more on...

Today I worked on writing up the awards for each of my students. This is yearly school tradition where every student in the school is honored for some quality they have shown or developed through the school year. Normally we have this awards ceremony on the last day of school. We call each student up and present them with their award and tell a little story about how they've shown this quality. This year we'll be recording our presentation (teachers only) and then live streaming the recording for students and families to watch.  At first I was worried about trying to think of an award for each child since we haven't been together in so long and we rely so much on observation to help us. However, it has been really special to think back on our first 6 months of the year together and contemplate the qualities I saw shining in each student. This process is the highlight of my year as a teacher. No student can shine in every way, every day. It can be an exhausting job and I oft...

I finally finished creating and printing the "end of the year" booklet that I'm sending home for the students to fill out. It's titled "My Distance Learning Book" and includes pages to write and draw about different questions and prompts to reflect on this time of learning from home. It includes prompts like "ways that I was helpful," or a page on different feelings they may have had and another to reflect on when they practiced different life skills (truthfulness, relaxation, kindness etc.) On my way to go and make copies I shared what I had made with my neighbor, a former teacher at our school, who made a comment referring to how few schools might ask questions like these of their students. Normally I would be observing my students and making my own notes about ways that they have learned and grown in this different areas throughout the term. This booklet came about as a way to try to capture their experience and growth this term in lieu of our u...

Even though I know how important and helpful routines are, I have found it incredibly hard to create an sense of regularity for myself within this quarantine time. I end up staying up too late, eating at odd times, struggling to get out of bed, or forgetting to drink water.  Why don't we do the things we know are go for us? Usually it's because the lower brain states (fight/flight and our emotional brain) have taken over and we're not operating from our prefrontal cortex where clear decision making happens. In yogic terms this area of the brain is known as the seat of superconsciousness; it's where we can access intuition.                                              It's helpful to remember this the next time you find yourself thinking "why are they behaving that way? They should know better!" Well, the answer is they do know better but in order to do better, we hav...

The unknowns seem to multiply by the day and the questions outnumber the answers. It's an interesting time to be alive! I just finished up a staff meeting via Zoom where we continue to discuss possibilities for the future of our little school, our classes and our community. This "great pause" and the gradual transition back toward movement and activity is giving us an opportunity to rethink how we really want to do things and envision new possibilities. There are many ideas and opinions but as we often ask here at Ananda, what's trying to happen? It's a deep question that gets tossed about a lot but how do we really go about answering it? First, we have to take our opinions, our expectations, our likes and dislikes out of the mix, which is harder than it sounds. Or perhaps just as hard as it sounds!  We have to be willing to put those things aside, to consider that there is a bigger picture beyond simply what we currently see or have known. We have to expand beyo...

A friend posted this picture on Facebook today and it made me smile. So much natural, uncontainable joy! This is who we really are.  I miss being around the natural joy and delight of the children at school. There is something so precious about their discoveries, the way they see things for the first time, even when it's not the first time. The amazement over ice crystals in a frozen puddle, the caterpillar in the road, racing to climb the cherry tree at recess to eat the not-yet-ripe cherries.  In my mind and in my heart I can almost hear and feel their excitement when we discover something new or come upon some new question or connection in our day. It feels so alive to be in those moments of wonder and curiosity and appreciation with them. Ever new. The question is: can we experience these moments of authentic shared presence and collective curiosity and discovery through distance learning? What does that look like?  I'm craving the beautiful mix of spontaneity and rou...

While I'm not currently teaching in the classroom there is still lots of learning happening. One of the wonderful things about Education for Life is that it is something that we teachers can (and do!) apply in our own lives, not just in the classroom.  One of the building blocks of education are the relationships - building a sense of safety and connection so that learning can happen. It's how our brains are wired actually! If we don't feel safe and connected we can't access the higher brain states (in the prefrontal cortex) where learning and decision making happen. Well, with all of us at a distance these days, connections have become even more important but also a little harder to maintain at times. I'm realizing that simply showing up on a Zoom call does not automatically equal connection. I've noticed myself so focused on the lesson plan that I forget there are real people on the other end! Just like in the classroom, each person needs some little opportuni...

I've been wanting to start this blog for awhile, to write and share about my current experiences as a teacher and more specifically as an Education for Life teacher. So what has stopped me? All the same old worries that stop many of us from doing new things. Who am I to do this? What do I have to say? Will it be good enough? What if I fail or make mistakes? Well, there has been a surge of inspiration and energy lately that is helping me to more consciously work against these false beliefs and doubts. Firstly, by just noticing them and then by doing things anyways. By showing up. It's a great trick I've learned along the way that has taken me much farther than I ever expected. Just show up with sincerity and willingness. So here I am, making the commitment to show up and share. Today is Swami Kriyananda's birthday. He is the founder of Ananda Village, the community where I live, and the author of the book Education for Life which guides and inspires the work we do...